SPC :: Black & White :: Transparent

/ 19 February 2007

Sometimes I feel transparent. When there is something on my mind, it shows. I become the quiet, absent minded girl in the corner. Only there is no corner to stand in during the routines of the day. So I go on, blending in the world, when all I feel I need to do is stand out. Litteraly stand out; stay at home, inside protected by walls. Or go to the beach, walk in a forest, breathe in crisp fresh air. When I feel this need, and I am not able to act on it, I find it hard to catch the breath of daily life.

This has just been one of those days. In a situation like this, I don't realize what I need. Because writing things down, always helps. Reading a book or magazine, always helps. Daydreaming, always helps. Meditation always helps. Yet, these things hardly ever pop up into my mind when I need them the most.

Why is it that when we become transparent, it is so hard to see what is inside of us?

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