The summer starts with a grey and rainy day here and this does me good. I feel vulnerable today and a bright shining sun would not have helped me much. I share my feelings, my vulnerability because maybe someone out there needs to read this, needs to know that these feelings are okay.
I realized this after i made several phone calls to work to let them know that i won't be able to make it today, or tomorrow. One person wasn't sure if i could do what i did: call in sick because my grandmothers health is going down hill again and this fact has hit me hard. Unstoppable stream of tears hard. Another person understood. Less words where shared with the later, but they were all the words i needed to hear and I realized that this person knows that i had a choice in going to work, or staying home.
Sometimes you just have to sit with your feelings, and not swallow the tears. Sometimes you need to let them fall.
The longer tears stay inside, the bigger they get.
~*~
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