On finding my voice

Yesterday, when researching a company and the work they do, I realised that the more hours I put in, the clearer their message becomes to me. This makes creating a tone of voice for a company much, much easier. It takes time though, a tone of voice isn’t created in a day. This got me thinking about my own voice, how I once lost it and how I found it -eventually.

A lesson learned the hard way

Finding my voice, was a lesson I learned the hard way, years ago. After blogging for several years on a blog called ‘Dreamer Girl’, so-called because I was always dreaming up new adventures and day dreaming was -and still is- one of my favourite things to do, I decided it was time to share my true voice. To do so I thought I needed to start afresh. Alarm bells should have gone off, right then and there. A voice isn't found in a day or by erasing the past. It requires days, weeks, years of jibber jabber, slowly growing into the words that tell your story. Of course this is easy to say now, because I learned that lesson, but back then I thought a new blog, with a new name, would help me connect to my true voice even better.

Fading away

I couldn't have been more wrong. As it turned out I wasn’t getting closer to the true me, just farther away. I was looking more and more at others and their words,  instead of at myself and my words. My voice was fading. Slowly but steadily. I leaned on the experience and knowledge of others. Fear clouded my judgment, up to the point that I couldn’t see anymore. Until someone pointed it out to me. Instantly, all was clear. Painstakingly clear. The words on my pages, weren't mine. Obviously I removed them, I apologised for my mistake. What followed was a long proces of regrouping, searching and looking back to see what was real and what not.

Finding my voice

Fast for almost five years. A lesson learned. It took a very long time before I opened up again. Before I realised that my voice was here all along. Under layers of fear of not being good enough. Looking back I learned so much from this experience. I found my voice and now I trust it to be true, to be me and to be enough.

And I still dream.

Every day.

p.s. I'd love to hear how you found your voice.